Little Scare

We are not at church this morning.  Mario is working, and Avery and I are at home.  I really long to be there listening to a great Bible Study lesson and sermon, singing praises, and fellowshipping with friends, but we’re having a little scare.  My blood pressure has shot up pretty suddenly and I’m having a hard time keeping it down despite being on meds for it. It’s not in the danger zone yet, but it’s creeping pretty close.   I noticed it because I wasn’t feeling quite right yesterday, and because we are supposed to be watching diligently  for any rise in blood pressure.  When I was pregnant with Avery, it started really rising at about 30 weeks, and I was put on bed rest.  The situation got dangerous enough for both of us that they had to deliver her at 35 weeks.  The risk for having preeclampsia a second time is pretty substantial, so we have been watching.  Pre-e is a condition that only occurs in pregnant women after 20 weeks of pregnancy.  The exact cause is unclear, but it is characterized by high blood pressure and swelling that can lead to seizures, problems with the mommy's liver and kidneys, and lack of nutrition to the baby.  The standard care is bed rest and blood pressure medication, but the only cure is to deliver the baby.   We want Lily to have every possible advantage given all of her potential challenges, and coming early would not be what’s best for her.  Please, please pray that this is not the start of preeclampsia, and that at my Dr. apt tomorrow afternoon, we are able to find a way to keep me pregnant quite a while longer. 

I also seem to be coming down with a cold.  I’ve had a nasty cough keeping me up at night for the past two nights, and today I have a sore throat and slightly stuffy nose.  Avery is sneezing, so I’m sure I won’t be alone in my discomfort. 

I’m worried.  I know I shouldn’t be.  I know God has it all under control.  I mean really, if He can handle major malformations and nearly non-existent chances of Lily surviving, what’s some blood pressure and a silly cold?  I wish I could get my heart caught up with my brain on this.  I think it’s going to take some serious prayer time.  I keep chasing “What ifs.”  What if I have to go on bed rest?  How will I take care of Avery?  What if Lily comes early and we have a long NICU stay like we did with Avery?  How can we give both babies the attention they need?  I always want to have a plan, and some of these problems don’t leave us with many solutions.  We don’t have family anywhere nearby who could come help out.  Again, I need to really, fully know that God does have a plan for all of this that will bring glory to Him, even if I have no idea what that plan looks like or how we fit in. 

Please pray for Lily’s and my health, and for peace, increased faith, and continued joy in this journey for Mario and me.